Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Undertow: The Someone EP

Undertow formed sometime in the Fall of 1991 or Spring of 1992. I don't quite recall quite how, I just remember someone saying I should show at at some guys house with a few other people and suddenly we were in a band. Originally, there were six of us at the first practice, but we quickly "kicked out" two of them and demoted one of the others to half-time. (Worth noting, the original lead singer is now a professional writer and Salon.com's Washington Bureau Correspondent, and the original keyboardist is now an acclaimed professional keyboardist on Broadway. The guys who stayed in the band mostly work in computers.) In retrospect, I assume it was Jeff who had arranged everything, from the initial formation to the eventual shaping of the band. (And I also doubt the other guys were actually "kicked out", but it makes for a better story.) The core membership quickly set in with me, Jeff and Mat (then Matt, I believe), with sporadic involvement by Jordan.

I remember very little about the first practices. I played bass in the band, which was new for me. I'd only recently purchased a bass, some ugly blue $100 Charvette. My inclusion in the band was likely due more to the fact that I actually owned a bass. By that point (start of sophomore year), guitarists were a dime a dozen, but no one played bass. (Worth noting, I did not own a bass amp. I instead used my guitar amp, which took on some very odd characteristics due to misuse, including a tendency to fart when you turned it off.)

Our sound was really a direct amalgam of our influences. Jeff wanted nothing more deeply than to be Eddie Vedder, Jordan and Mat worshipped Smashing Pumpkins and Jane's Addiction, and I loved Warrant & Poison. Our early setlists more or less reflected this combo, with the exception of the hair metal, which was definitively uncool by that point. Album tracks from Gish, stuff from the Singles soundtrack, covers of songs our favorite bands covered... that was what we played. In fact, our very first live song was The Who's Baba O'Reilly, played exclusively because Pearl Jam covered it. (And because Jordan could mostly play the keyboard part.)

In a sense, the band really became our lives. Every Saturday, we'd meet in Mat's basement for 4 or 5 hours, playing music and eating pizza. Waking moments were spent either at school, doing homework, practicing with the band or practicing solo. (Or engaged in low level debauchery.) It took six months or so before we were ready for an audience.

The date of our first show (and the first live rock performance for anyone in the band) is lost to antiquity (or at least my collection of flyers), but it took place at Fatty's Restaurant in downtown Rockville sometime during the spring or summer of 1992. (Fatty's is no more, sadly.) It was a 2 hour show, $8 at the door ($3 cover and $5 food minimum). The show was a wonderful mess. Recordings of it exist somewhere, but I can't find them. We probably played 75% covers, 25% originals, and we bounced around on instruments constantly. (We were proud of our prowess at multi-instrumentalism... one flyer I found read "Jeff - vocals / guitar / bass --- John - bass / guitar / vocals ---- Jordan - guitar / bass / vocals (mysteriously leaving out keyboard).) I remember the stage getting mobbed during an "audience participation" cover of "Smells Like Teen Spirit". Because I could scream reasonably well, I sang the Chris Cornell part on Hunger Strike, probably in a different key than Jeff.

In retrospect, we must have sounded horrible. We didn't have anything resembling a PA, so our sound was entirely dictated by our amps pointing at the audience and people yelling "John's too loud!" or "We can't hear the vocals!" I think we ran vocals through my practice amp. But it worked, and we quickly became the go-to band for all of your sonic needs, if you were an underclassman at Richard Montgomery High. (Mat went to Wootton, which featured more band competition for whatever reason.)

Before long, Jeff had some songs written, probably about a dozen. (Jordan wrote a few songs too, but Mat and I were silent partners for the most part.) My technophile grandfather bought me a Tascam four-track mixer and we set out to make our first EP. I'm reasonably sure that with the exception of my "work" with Fetal Pigs, this was the first time any of us had recorded anything, let alone multi-track recording.

We went down to Tower Records on Rockville Pike and bought a 20 pack of these super high-quality 20 minute Maxell tapes. They became the recording medium for the Undertow "Someone" EP. Over the course of a few weekends, we all took our turns playing into the recorder, and we had a record. Mat technically "engineered" it, in that he did things like putting a table on its side to "isolate" the drums. But mostly we went directly out of our amps in to the recorder and that was it. We had no idea what we were doing, but we did it with gusto. (In one of the more absurd rituals we had, we degaussed before every recording. We'd read that static electricity could mess with the recording medium, so we ran a ring degausser over the 4-track before every session. This probably did more harm than good.)

The lead song was "Someone", a rather cheesy little ballad Jeff had penned about his unrequited, though publicly acknowledged, crush on a girl in our class named Kristen Monie. (This crush also manifested itself in the capitalization of the letters M-O-N-I-E to form her last name on our fliers.) It featured four chords, no chorus, and a bridge directly lifted from a Led Zeppelin song. An unlikely hit, but there it was.

Our second track was "Whitewash", my favorite song on the EP. I have no idea what the words are about, but I dig the groove. At one point in the song, Mat and I get completely out of sync and end up creating this awesome alternate groove. I still think this is pretty out there for high school sophomores.

The third track was an acoustic version of "Someone", featuring Jordan playing my parent's baby grand.

Our final track showcased our social awareness (or at least Jeff's social awareness) and was an acoustic number called "Take a Good Look." It was about homelessness, and even managed to work in a pro-choice message too. It was the 90s alright.

The whole thing clocked in at about 17 minutes, and it made us rock stars.

As I remember it, the album was a bit of a big deal. We were the first band in our high school year to actually write and record anything. We sold it for $4 and called it our first single, billed as "featuring the track Someone in both acoustic and electric versions, along with two tracks that would not be released on the impending album!" Yup. B-sides already. (Like any good band, we'd already titled our unwritten album... it was called "Termites in my Wet Basement". Named after a flood in Mat's basement revealed a termite infestation, cancelling practice.) Distribution was all manual... Me & Mat copying tapes in our bedrooms. A guy named Maury Apple did the album cover. I can't remember how many albums we sold, but I think it was in the dozens, approaching 100. All of them were to friends and family, as far as I know. We sold out, or at least came close to it.

Undertow continued to play out quite a bit, both with and without Jordan. We played Fatty's a few more times. The high school Rock Bash, our first show that required auditions. Inexplicably, we played a Jimi Hendrix Festival, despite not knowing any Jimi Hendrix songs. (We learned Purple Haze at the last minute, and I played the Star Spangled Banner.) And we even played the City of Rockville's Battle of the Bands (high school edition, I assume). That was a fun show, since Mat and Jordan had been grounded for something or another (fleeing the police while on a late night stroll, I think?) and Jeff and I played with a backup drummer. We scored really well and may have won the competition, except for a judge who rated us very low for our pro-choice song "The Right", a catchy tune which rather unsubtly declared as its chorus "She's got the right to choose!" and stole its entire musical structure from "Jack & Diane". (His objections stemmed from his own pro-life stance, not his objection to John Melloncamp plagiarism.)

Throughout my junior year (92-93), the band played on, but things started to change. For whatever reason, it started becoming more "Jeff's Band" than Undertow, at least in the eyes of Mat, Jordan and me. Maybe it was one too many Pearl Jam covers, maybe it was a growing friendship between the rest of us that didn't include Jeff as much, maybe it was the realization that Jordan had a much better singing voice, maybe it was my own frustration playing bass rather than lead guitar, maybe it was the inherent need for teen rebellion in an environment without all that much to rebel against or maybe it was something completely invented, but for whatever reason, we just got sick and resentful of the band. Over the summer of 1993, Jeff spent the summer in Germany, and Mat, Jordan and I formed Twisted Fish.

In one of the grand asshole moves of all time, we didn't let Jeff know he wasn't in the band until he saw me selling copies of the new Twisted Fish EP to someone in our English class. (Sorry, man. We sucked.)

That effectively ended the Undertow experience. Later though, in late Summer of 1994, Mat, Jeff and I did get together and record another batch of original songs that were never released. I did uncover the masters for those in my basement recently, and need to get them to Mat for mixing down.

So, without further ado, I present the first appearance online of the Undertow "Someone" single. This recording is super-low quality, just a walkman into my soundcard, but it'll give an idea to anyone curious. Maybe Mat can post a better version at some point. (Sorry these aren't streaming, but the low quality results in weird anomalies when I try to set it up.)

Enjoy!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Goddamn Stupid Peice of Shit

So, in an effort to stimulate the economy, celebrate Father's Day and generally waste my own time and money, I decided to buy a new AV Receiver today. I can't say I needed a new AV Receiver, but I'm vaguely considering a few new HDMI devices in the not-too-distant future, and thought it'd be nice to lay the groundwork for them while cleaning up my existing setup.

My home theater setup right now is borderline annoying. I've got a cheesy Home Theater in a Box setup that I bought ages ago, an HD cable box, a non-HD dual tuner Tivo, an HDMI switcher (since my TV only has one HDMI input), a standard def (but HDMI upconverting) DVD changer and the TV itself. In all this leads to five basic activities: watching Tivo, watching HD cable, watching HD cable with surround sound, watching DVDs and watching DVDs with surround sound. (Six activities if you also count the external input for the TV, which we use for video games and blowing up the laptop.)

We also have a Logitech Harmony remote to manage all this crap, since otherwise I'd have six different remotes to wrangle.

The amount of cabling in this setup is borderline obscene and difficult to get at. Most of the cabling to the TV is 4 meters long to accommodate the hidden wiring, and since everything has its own separate audio, there are wires running left everywhere.

My goal in a new AV receiver was to eliminate the HDMI switch, and possibly consolidate some of the audio cables into the HDMI. I found a nice mid-range Pioneer unit I liked that was on sale at Best Buy, so I picked it up. It can even talk nice with the iPhone!

The first hour or so went smoothly, removing the existing unit and hooking up speakers and the DVD player. Then came time for the HD cable box. Plug in the HDMI and the screen flashes: "The HD content protection of your display has been compromised. Please use the YPbPr outputs for your HD connection." It does this for 20 seconds and then goes black. Off to google I go...

It turns out that the box I have from Charter cable is particularly sensitive in the HDCP handshake required with the TV, and my new receiver doesn't seem to handle it. Which means that I can't use the receiver with my existing cable box through HDMI. It IS possible to go through component cables, so I wander down to the basement and dig out a set I have down there. No dice. After spending 15 minutes hooking them up, it turns out that I can't have a setup with component cables in and HDMI out. I don't have a spare 4 meter component cable, so I'm shit out of luck.

So, I spent 30 minutes un-hooking the new receiver and hooking the old one back up, and now I've got to re-pack my receiver and return it. Not because it doesn't work, but because it doesn't play nice with my system thanks to some fairly pedantic protocol negotiation aimed at stopping people from copying digital movies.

My buddy Josh pointed out this excellent recent Onion article that describes my experience perfectly, and wonderfully profanely.


Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work

Friday, June 12, 2009

Fried

I'd forgotten what it's like to feel completely fried. Too much work, too many hobbies, too much kid stuff, not enough sleep.

Silence in this space implies that too much is going on elsewhere.

Things I want to write about when I have time:
  • Movie Reviews for: Wolverine (bleh), Star Trek (sweet!) and Up! (sweet!, but in a different way)
  • My obsession with Look Around You
  • Band Fun, including the large new mixer we've been eying for more than a year
  • Kid Fun
  • My forgetfulness re: showering, and what this implies
  • The garden
  • Other things escaping my mind now

Hope things are well in your blog-o-ville.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Dextromethorphan & Phenylephrine rule my life

My allergies generally aren't too bad, thanks to a long regimen of allergic immunotherapy earlier this decade. A Claritin (10mg loratadine) on heavy allergy days, and I'm fine. Moving from the warmer east coast to the cooler climes of Wisconsin has helped. Lower temps = less pollen. (My specific cocktail of east coast allergens included Grass, Ragweed and Tree Pollen, though with different sets of each out here, my protections aren't as robust any more.)

On our drive back east last week, I noticed a marked change once we crossed the Mason Dixon Line. Namely, major nasal congestion leading to post-nasal drip leading to the variety of coughing that makes people suspect you're the cause of every pandemic in the last decade. For whatever reason, my constitution LOVES post-nasal drip. If I get it for a day, I get it for a month. One time, I ignored it too long and it turned into bronchitis.

So now, I get to be "that guy" for the month of June, constantly sucking on a cough drop (Menthol 7 mg), renewing my Day-Quil (the aforementioned Dextromethorphan 10 mg & Phenylephrine 5 mg, with a nice shot of Acetaminophen 325 mg to quell the chest pains from epic coughing fits) every 4 hours and sounding more like Barry White than a white man should. Yay. Adding to the fun, I have a gig on Friday, so I need to power-up with lots of other fun stuff to keep me up and going. Whoo-hoo!

Final total for the road trip: 2004.8 miles, including sidetrips. The kids were troopers. Given the cost differential (maybe $200 for gas vs. more than $1200 for flights), I suspect this is now our preferred travel method out east. Fun stuff.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

A Random Collection of Thoughts for Today

  • As you probably know, I record random cover versions of my favorite songs and post them to my website now and then. One of my favorite singer-songwriters is a guy named Paul Sanchez. About 8 years ago, I recorded a version of one of his songs called "Confidential Dance." Last night, I checked my email and saw this: "I just checked out your version of my song Confidential Dance, very cool. Rockin' but still vulnerable. i dig it, thanks for the cover. red beans and ricely yours, Paul Sanchez"
  • Awesome.
  • Last night, I played a little local showcase for FAWM. Did four songs and a little jam. Can you think of a better way to get pumped up for the show than getting an email from one of your favorite artists telling you they listened to something you did and thought it was cool?
  • The show went really well. I remembered most of the words, my setup went mostly without a hitch, and the dozen or so people there seemed to enjoy it. From my end, I like playing enough that I'll play to an empty room as long as there are lights on me.
  • I may have some video of the event up shortly, for anyone who wants to watch a grainy, static webcam of me yelling.
  • Many thanks to Drewfus for comin' out and representing for the Das Binky Recording Collective. He is owed beers.
  • Got home at about midnight, went to bed around 12:30. When I got upstairs, three-year old DD was still awake, reading a book with the light on. I recommended she go to bed, but she expressed no interest. I decided this wasn't a battle I wanted to deal with, and just encouraged her to go to bed soon.
  • At 12:37, DD and sister ran in saying that the light was broken. It turns out that it was. But then I noticed the clock was out. And that the street looked really dark too. Yup, the power was out. The kids were freaked out and crept into bed with Mommy. I found a flashlight and wandered downstairs to call the power company. Power came back at about 2 am.
  • In a somewhat un-related incident, the Internet went out at around 7 pm. I called the phone company this AM, and after 20 minutes of tests, we determined that the cable modem was fried. K mentioned that a big lightning strike hit nearby around them, and it occurs to me that the modem is NOT plugged into a surge protector. So, they're sending a new one, and I'm without Internet at home for 2 days.
  • I've recently become addicted to a new video game called "Plants vs. Zombies", in which you try to stop a wave of zombies from destroying your house by placing militant plants on your lawn. It's awesome. As a result of this game, I've been up till around 1 AM three times this week. Watch the music video trailer. It will eat your brain with its awesomeness.
  • As a result of being up too late too many days in a row, coupled with the added lost sleep due to the power outage, I am borderline comatose today. This manifests itself in a bleakly dark sense of humor and an unwillingness to deal with bullshit. I would have worked from home, but I have no Internet. I would have taken the day off, but I'm taking off four days next week. Yay.
  • We're prepping for a big road trip next week. I went to AAA and got a Triptik. In a nice bit of forethought, I got an extra set of maps for the kids to use / enjoy / destroy. We'll be logging about 2500 miles over the course of a week, all of it with the kids. I can't decide if we're adventuresome or idiotic.
  • As an aside to all of the above, on the whole, people need to chill out some more.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Nature at Work, with a little help

On Sunday, we took a little roadtrip down to Janesville, WI to check out the botanical gardens. Good fun, and afterwards we stopped by a little nursery in town to check out the early season plants. There was nothing we were interested in yet, but the girls were absolutely fascinated by a Venus Fly Trap, so we picked one up.

Every kid gets a Venus Fly Trap at some point. You poke at it a few times, set off all of the little mouths, put it on a windowsill and forget about it until 2 months later it's dead. It's a fun cycle.

By the time we got the thing home, three of the five mouths had been triggered by false alarms of one kind or another (only one linked to the kids). I'd set it up in the living room, nice bright warm room with a lot of indirect sunlight. Everyone was playing around the house, and I heard a big ol' housefly buzzing around the front room. Not a normal housefly, but a big, slow ginormous one. Stupid guy too, kept buzzing in the same circle by the front window.

I grabbed a paper towel and batted the dude down... didn't kill him, just stunned him a bit. Grabbed his wings and took him over to the fly trap and fed him in. It looked pretty comical... the dude was way too big for the tiny Venus Fly Trap mouth. It looked like an anaconda trying to eat a deer. But the plant dutifully closed as best as it could, and I ran to get the kids.

Unfortunately, the fly unstunned himself and pretty quickly realized that he could just walk out of the trap. He did so, and spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out on the warm stems of the fly trap. At this point in the season, there aren't too many flies in the house for the plant to feed on, so maybe I'll take it outside in the evenings to get some grub.

Fun times at the Das Binky house.

Monday, April 27, 2009

The Wackness: A Quick Review

I'm really lukewarm on "The Wackness", but that's more of an averaged-out reaction than an overall reaction. Parts of it were spot-on excellent, depicting a menagerie of locations and characters that perfectly capture a time and place. But much of it was mired down in the kind of narcissism that doomed "The Ice Storm" and kept me from really connecting with anything in the movie for more than a few scenes at a time. Fire and Ice make lukewarm water, right?

The movie follows Josh, a teen pot dealer, and his friendship with his addict shrink (Ben Kingsley) throughout the summer of 1994. (Is 15 years ago too soon to have a period piece? And did I really graduate from high school 15 years ago?) Josh mostly spends the summer trying to have a relationship with his shrink's step-daughter, and failing in one way or another, while Ben Kingsley slowly tries to flush his life down the toilet. They're an interesting pair, sort of a Harold and Maude for the 90s. Josh takes Sir Ben on a tour of his world, and "hilarity" ensure.

It gets a little tiresome to watch people just be petty and irresponsible for an hour and a half. It's one thing to watch on a Trainspotting kind of scale... here, it just came across as a little boring. I had trouble caring about them. Josh is an interesting character in spots... he's a naive, innocent drug dealer, and a lonely kid yearning for connection. As the shrink, Ben Kingsley is alternately entertaining and alienating, but mostly sad.

I can't quite recommend this flick. It's got something to offer for the right audience... if you suspect you might be in that audience, check it out. Otherwise, I think there are a lot of other movies that offer better versions of the same aspects the movie tries to capture, ranging from "Do the Right Thing" to "Harold & Maude" to "Friday" (if you're looking for the drug comedy this was marketed as).

As a bit of a post-script, this is the third or fourth movie in last few months that I've come into with completely misguided expectations thanks to misleading movie marketing and/or poor Netflix descriptions. The Wackness was described as an indie comedy, and is about anything but. The extent of the comedy is pretty much "Look, Ben Kingsley has a bong!", or maybe the larger "all of life is a joke" style of comedy. This was a comedy in the same way "The Catcher in the Rye" is a comedy. I understand that movie marketers need to do their best to sell a movie, but I've been feeling really misled lately in relying on genre descriptions. Shape up, marketers!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Fetal Pigs: Where's the Drummer?

In the past 10 years or so, I've moved at least seven times. Every move requires me to pack up all of my crap into boxes and shuttle them around. With frequent moves, you end up with some boxes that don't get opened for a few years at a time.

This afternoon, I spent some time cleaning up the basement, and rifled through a few of those boxes. And in one of them, I found a neat old gem... the first "album" I ever recorded, on New Year's Eve 1990.

The band was called Fetal Pigs. It was me and my buddy Mike, who was one of only two or three people I knew who played guitar. We sat next to each other in science class. We'd hang out a lot looking at tablature books, chatting about guitarists and feebly playing. By late 1990, I'd been playing guitar for maybe a year and a half. Mike had been playing about half that time.

Our drummer was a guy named Roland, who was the first guy I legitimately made any music with, ever. Roland and I were the guys in the basement doing air guitar to Def Leppard (and his brother's Depeche Mode albums). We graduated from air guitar to posing with tennis rackets in front of a mirror, and eventually got actual instruments at about the same time. Mike and Roland didn't really know each other if I remember, but by virtue of being the only drummer I knew, Roland was in the band.

Mike had a sleep over for New Years. (This was 8th grade, so not having a big party to go to wasn't overly weird.) Roland couldn't make it. So, we created our Magnum Opus, "Where's The Drummer?" :

I don't remember the exact recording process, but I'm pretty sure it was Mike's tape recorder sitting in the corner of the room. No mics, no drums, no bass, no multi-tracking, just the two of us on vocals and guitar, all live takes. Awesome. The entire album clocks in at about 13 minutes. Note the sticker indicating that this is the "MASTER" recording. I don't know if that means this was actually the tape we recorded on, or whether it's a first generation copy. As a sign of our laziness in obtaining a pristine recording, immediately after the album ends, it bleeds into some random Morning Zoo DJ I'd taped off the radio. I'm pretty sure the stock picture of the drums was from an ad in a guitar magazine.

I don't recall whether we actually did anything with this. I don't know that we made a copy for anyone else, played it for anyone other than our parents, or actually did anything with any of the songs. As I remember it, this was in a complete vacuum.

Notice that little bit of paper sticking out the left side? That's the liner notes:

(My handwriting still looks exactly like that.)

Here's the full page:

But since that's pretty much illegible (it's 18 year old Mac dot matrix), here's the text:

FETAL PIGS - WHERE’S THE DRUMMER?

WARZ SUCK — they just do... (dedicated to Saddam Hussein)
JIMI IS GOD — Mike’s true hero (dedicated to Mr. Hendrix)
EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN — as recorded by Poison
BATTLING AXES FROM HELL — a brief moment of inspiration (very brief)
WHERE’S THE DRUMMER — a basic explanation of the album (a joke, nothing more)
ALL CHICKENS ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL — our instrumental anthem (sounds better live!)

Fetal Pigs are:

John Argentiero — lead vocals, lead guitar
Mike Palys — lead & backing vocals, rhythm guitar
Roland Lo — drums

John uses Yamaha Electric Guitars, Washburn Acoustics, Marshall amplifiers, and Dunlop picks.
Mike uses B.C. Rich Electric Guitars, Gianinni Acoustics, Marshall amplifiers, and his favorite translucent purple pick
Roland uses Pearl drums, Zildjian cymbals and whatever sticks he can get his hands on.

If you are interested in playing bass in an up and coming young band give us a call (we can supply bass)!

This EP was written, recorded, and mixed during a twelve hour period between December 31, 1990 — January 1, 1991

Roland was absent at the recording of this EP because he wasn’t sleeping over at Mike’s house on New Year Eve.

Coming soon - FETAL PIGS II: Afterbirth

Some notes on the above:
  • The EP is recorded on both sides of a cassette, same stuff on both sides. By weird coincidence, if you flip the tape after the last song, it's almost exactly at the start of the same song on the other side. Bad ass.
  • I have guitar solos in most of these songs. They are all exactly the same.
  • I was lead guitarist on this effort, but Mike lapped my skill set pretty quickly after this. I believe he went to sleepaway guitar camp, and came back with a lot more technique than I had. Realistically, I never got a whole lot better than what you hear on the tape, I just got nicer equipment. And I switched mostly to bass for the rest of my high school bands.
  • In "Jimi is God", I attempt to play a brief guitar solo with my teeth. I had braces at the time. At one point, the string get caught in my braces, very audibly. This is the coolest record I have of anything from my youth.
  • Every Rose has it's Thorn was completely my idea. Mike hated Poison. I still play that song in my band. I don't actually play the solo that much better.
  • I still love my manically spastic solos on "Battling Axes from Hell". I suspect that with an actual amp, they would have sounded better. Mike's solos are the slower, jazzier ones. Mine are the one's that sound like someone who had too much caffeine.
  • The "Sounds Better Live!" tagline for "All Chickens Are Not Created Equal" is a bit of a lie. Fetal Pigs never played live. In fact, I'm not entirely convinced we ever played this in practice. (Nor am I sure we ever actually practiced as a full band.)
  • "All Chickens Are Not Created Equal" is really just a bizarre series of overlapping unrelated riffs in different keys played on top of one another. It's instrumental and, in retrospect, a complete waste of tape.
  • With the exception of the opening riff in "All Chickens Are Not Created Equal", I'm reasonably sure Mike wrote all of the music and most of the lyrics.
  • "Fetal Pigs II: Afterbirth" never actually came out. (Though, I did write some cheesy metal under the moniker Ultradeath using the Fetal Pigs : Afterbirth album name. The listing is still up here, but the file is long gone.)
  • We never got a bassist. Roland left the band shortly after this, and was replaced by Dave Mathison, who was probably the only guy Mike knew that played drums. (Band politics in 8th and 9th grade were weird.) Fetal Pigs lasted another few years, mostly as a cover band. I don't think any of these songs were ever played again.
  • Re: the equipment list, this was something we saw in all of our metal albums, and it never occurred to me that these rock stars were naming their equipment because they had promotional deals with the companies. We were just naming them because they were the only instruments we had and we thought they were cool. (Though as Mike progressed into more serious guitar work, he was later mortified by his B.C. Rich Warlock.)
  • On the equipment topic, most of the acoustic guitar is my 12-string Washburn. All of the amps are single-channel practice amp, and sound painful. My guitar was my yellow Yamaha, which I still have today.
So, those were good times. Fetal Pigs continued to exist as a minor entity until I started playing with Undertow in 10th grade. Mike and I went to different high schools and were heading in different musical directions, and the band and friendship drifted apart. I consider Undertow (more on them at a future date) my first "real" band, since we actually played live shows. But this tape is a really cool document of my first musical experiments. Good stuff.

And since I KNOW you're longing to hear it, here you go. After writing about it, I decided I needed to have a copy for the kids. This is just a walkman into my PC, so the noise level is horrible, but deal with it. (Especially on the opening of Every Rose...)

Presented for the first time since 1991, Fetal Pigs' Where the Drummer. In Mono.

For some reason, the streaming thing isn't working for these, so click to hear them.

WARZ SUCK — 2:14

JIMI IS GOD — 0:34

EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN — 4:01

BATTLING AXES FROM HELL — 1:04

WHERE’S THE DRUMMER — 0:55

ALL CHICKENS ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL — 4:04

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Some Additional Thoughts on Watchmen

NOTE: If you haven't seen and read Watchmen, this post will be of limited or no interest at all, and it contains Spoilers for both. If you intend to see or read Watchmen, bookmark this for later. Also, Giant Squid.

So, I finally finished re-reading the Watchmen graphic novel and have seen the movie twice. One of my first thoughts is that anyone who has any complaints about the film's deviations from the source material (from a plot / inclusion perspective) has incredibly unrealistic expectations. With the exception of the ending (more in a minute), this is one of the most faithful adaptations of a novel I've ever seen that still managed to work as a standalone movie. Some adaptations (the first two Harry Potter movies for example) stick so doggedly to the source material that the film suffers greatly... novels and cinema are different mediums, and what works in one wouldn't work in another. On the whole, Zack Synder did an awesome job, much better than I would have expected after seeing "300".

The Watchmen novel would have been an unwatchable five-hour movie with no momentum had they filmed it totally faithfully. For the sake of momentum, things have to be dropped. Major drops were minimal... the whole Tales of the Black Freighter story (which has been made as a separate movie), Hollis Mason's death, a lot of chatting at the news stands and more Dr. Manhattan on Mars. A few other minor encounters. And it's easy to see how adding those in would have pushed the running time past three hours, again killing the momentum. (And we may get a chance to find out. Most of that stuff was filmed and will be out on DVD.)

I do think some of the tonal changes / additions were a little much... As Abstract Citizen pointed out, the action-y fight scenes dilute the idea that the Watchmen (other then Dr. Manhattan) are just normal folks in peak physical condition, not actual superheroes. That created a bit of a disconnect. And the sex scene felt hyper cheesy. But both of those additions make the movie more accessible to the casual fan. (Anyone longing for a "normal guy" super-hero can go watch Billy Zane in "The Phantom" and tell me how much fun that was.)

As for the ending... at the risk of sounding heretical, the movie's ending was better. The Giant Squid was weird and cool, but it really comes out of nowhere and doesn't make a whole lot of sense. The explanation of how the squid "works" is just kinda weak: The process of teleporting the creature kills it, and the cloned implantation of a psychic's brain sends an amplified death wave out, killing half the city and driving millions more insane. Ok then. Cool in context, but admittedly a little bit of a stetch. (Awesome visuals though.) The movie's choice to frame Dr. Manhattan as the source of Earth's potential destruction allows for more connection with the characters, a more closed circle and a more "feasible" future. The guys over at Chud put it well:
In the book? Veidt creates world peace by tricking the world into believing in aliens. The introduction of this "other" creates an new sense to togetherness that puts all differences aside.

In the movie? Veidt creates world peace by tricking the world into believing in GOD. An old testament kind of God. The watching, wrathful, Sodom and Gomorrah destroying type of God.
To me, that's a more affecting ending. The world already understands and fears Dr. Manhattan. The Giant Squid... well, it's a giant squid that wiped out New York. It's a little more abstract than the God Figure living among you for the past few decades turning on the world.

Both the Watchmen movie and novel are stand-alone artifacts. (I suspect it might be difficult to go into the movie completely cold, but I'm not sure.) I enjoyed them both equally and in different ways. And importantly, I'm glad they both exist.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Geekish Enthusiasm

For the most part, I find memoirs pretty boring and self-serving. Or narcissistic and solipsistic. I don't enjoy them. But one of the first sets of memoirs I ever remember reading were Richard Feynman's two books of anecdotes, "Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman!" and "What Do You Care What Other People Think?"

Feynman has a natural curiosity and directness that I find completely fascinating and endearing. There's a particular bit of an anecdote of his that sticks with me quite a bit, from his time at Princeton. It's popped up a few times lately in relation to random bits of Das Binky's life.
In the great big dining hall with stained-glass windows, where we always ate, in our steadily deteriorating academic gowns, Dean Eisenhart would begin each dinner by saying grace in Latin. After dinner he would often get up and make some announcements. One night Dr. Eisenhart got up and said, "Two weeks from now, a professor of psychology is coming to give a talk about hypnosis. Now, this professor thought it would be much better if we had a real demonstration of hypnosis instead of just talking about it. Therefore he would like some people to volunteer to be hypnotized.

I get all excited: There's no question but that I've got to find out about hypnosis. This is going to he terrific!

Dean Eisenhart went on to say that it would be good if three or four people would volunteer so that the hypnotist could try them out first to see which ones would be able to be hypnotized, so he'd like to urge very much that we apply for this. (He's wasting all this time, for God's sake!)

Eisenhart was down at one end of the hall, and I was way down at the other end, in the back. There were hundreds of guys there. I knew that everybody was going to want to do this, and I was terrified that he wouldn't see me because I was so far back. I just had to get in on this demonstration!

Finally Eisenhart said, "And so I would like to ask if there are going to be any volunteers . . ."

I raised my hand and shot out of my seat, screaming as loud as I could, to make sure that he would hear me: "MEEEEEEEEEEE!"

He heard me all right, because there wasn't another soul. My voice reverberated throughout the hall--it was very embarrassing. Eisenhart's immediate reaction was, "Yes, of course, I knew you would volunteer, Mr. Feynman, but I was wondering if there would be anybody else."
Lately, I feeling like that guy A LOT. Which is fun in it's own way, but come on, people... catch the fever! (And read Feynman. And come see Fountains of Wayne or Louis CK with me.)